Holi

FUN PART

Holi celebration was good. Didn't play with water colors. Because one friend has water-color-phobia. Lol. So, we decided to just play with Abir. I reached his home at 3 pm. Played Abir with him and did Pranam to uncle and aunty. Then we went another friend's home. There also same stuff. Then we started roaming in the city. We went to Kalyani chowk, Tilak Maidan Road and had a nice talk session with the in BB Collegiate playground. We were 3. One of my friend had drink. I somehow refrained myself with just few sips. Drink is common on Holi.

PHILOSOPHY PART

In Muzaffarpur Baba Ramdev had bee doing his yoga classes for last 6 days. I thought to meet him but was difficult to get appoitnment. He talks about Nationalism. I wanted to talk to him on this subject matter. He says, nationalism is the greatest religion. I do not entirely agree with this statement. He might be true in his own way. Everybody is true in his world. According to me - Humanity is the only religion. And since it is the only religion there is not scope of greatness. I hate adjectives like anything. You have no idea how can an adjective cause a world war. Nationalism will produce more hatred. Two nationalists are enemies. Because both love only his country. What I feel is all these nation will vanish one day. For permanent peace we have to establish a single religion - that is humanity on the earth.

In my mohalla, charm of Holi has decreased to some extent. May be because everybody is grown up now. I saw children playing holi happily. This is what happens when you grow more. When you know more. Children don't know much, they are happy. Adults know a lot, they are unhappy. So far, except children I have not met a single person who is happy. Society is unable to create even a single happy person. Society will create knowledgeous person, but not the happy person. Look at the eye of the person. You will get enough gauge of the person. Eyes will tell you almost everything of the person. You'll find their eyes are searching for something. As if something has lost. Something disastrous has happened. What I know is since eternity - nothing has happened so far. And nothing is gonna happen anyway. You will find they know the thing. Better than you. But that knowledge itself become boredom after some time. It becomes like a burden in your head which you are carrying. Look at the old people. They have all the experience of life. Their life become boring. Because they know the thing. They know how it's going to work. They have an idea, a predefined mindset, a prejudice, an arguementive attitude. They will analyze. They will filter. They will filter the love. Then they will choosy. They will slot the existence. The will create a separation. Their very same knowledge become source of infinite sorrow.

Now look at children. Children are just opposite of old people. They don't now much. They don't have a prejudice. They don't analyze, the don't filter, they don't resist. They just go on with the existence. That's why you find them charming. Because he is not resisting the nature. He is supporting the nature. Old people resist. You will find old people are in the mode of constant Resistance. As if he is fighting with someone inside him. A constant war is indwelling inside his mind. You'll find most of old people remains in pensive mood always. They are resisting something from inside. As if something is bugging them. Nothing is bugging them. Only their knowledge itself has now started bugging them. Their very same knowledge on which he had so much proud starts bugging them. Children are definitely god's greatest creation. Children are pure. Not much of contamination. But when he starts growing society starts contaminating him. Society uses various ways to contaminate them. It could be anything. Like Books, Movies, TV etc. I am not a great lover of Books. Do you know the formal definitions of Books? The philosophy behind books? Remember - All books are not good. There do exists bad books. Books have given more trouble than benefit to society. Specially religious books. Anyways...I will talk about books and language some time later.

:))

An old game

There was a game played on 2nd June 2004 on my computer at Muzaffarpur. Just thought to upload it. Click here to see the game

Nice win

This was a nice win over NagaSkaki. Click here to see the game
Game Analysis
As usual, I started with sicilian defence. NagaSkaki was very aggressive initially. This time Nagaskaki did opposite castling. Which in general is not that defensive strategy. I made nice use of horse and got one few advantages.

Tourist Places in Bihar

I will be in Muzaffarpur on 18Th March. I am planning to visit tourist places in Bihar. Like - Vaishali, Bodhgaya, Rajgir etc. Never got a chance to visit any of tourist place in Bihar. Vaishali is nearest to muzaffarpur. Vaishali is the center of Buddhism and Jainism. Vaishali is blessed by two superhuman - Mahavira and Buddha. Even city of Nazareth doesn't has this much glory as Vaishali. Nazareth only has Jesus. Vaishali has Buddha and Mahavira. Ganga is as glorious as Jordan river. Jesus went to Jordan river, John baptize him and said he is son of god. Ganga also have many stories associated with it. I have no intention to generate any socio-religio conflict. I am thinking - Bihar being the birth place of two great theology - Buddhism and Jainism why they don't have much influence there? Is it that Bihar inherently is Vedic society. These two persons were enough to eradicate any any vedic propaganda. The reason I think is their philosophy was not properly spreaded in India. For some reason I found Mahavira as the greatest person ever born. Mahavir was absolutely free. There was not even single bit of contamination in him. The reason why Jain theology could not spread much is because of their purity. Mahavir was so pure that he didn't even need clothes. Buddha used to wear one clothe wrapped upto his shoulder. Mahavir didn't. For him clothes makes no sense. However Buddha's path was middle path. Bdddha considered nakedness as extreme. Thats why he didn't encourage nakedness. Mahavir was absolutely free. He knows know boundaries. He knows no extreme. He doesn't know middle path or side path. He is absolutely free. Clothes or no clothes make no sense to him. He is perfectly pure. And it's difficult to appreciate 100% pure thing. You need at least some contamination to appreciate things. 100% pure gold is of no use. Some amount of contamination is required to make it useful. Right? Anything 100% pure is of no use. Whole semiconductor industry works on impurity. We dope silicon with impurity. Amount of impuruty is very less, but it's there. A pure silicon cannot do anything. But when you dope it, then it can make quadcore. That's the importance of impurity. Anything entirely pure cannot be creative. Some trace of impurity has to be there to remain creative.

Anyways, philosophy aprt. If you have knwoledge of tourist places in Bihar please let me know.

Like how to reach there, hotels, food, prices etc.

:)

Draw

Click here to watch the game. It was a nice game. Specially middle game.

How Ethical?

I want to do a startup. My parents wants me to do normal job. What should I do in this case? Should I disobey my parents? Should I become too conscious about my career? I am thankful to my parents to give me birth. But my journey is separate. I came through him. But I don't belong to him. Practically, I exist as a separate entity. Family is a social arrangement. Only humans have concept of family. No animal has concept of family. Have you ever seen an animal marrying? Father is nothing but a social arrangement. Family is a group of people with whom you spend slightly more time as compared to others. You stay under same roof. That's practicality. My father is just a medium to give me a birth. The whole creation has to support the birth. Has to sustain a birth. Each and every atom of the universe has to support birth. Has to accommodate birth. So, that way I am son of every atom of the universe. Because every atom contributed in some manner in my creation. That's the real feeling of gratitude. The gratitude you feel towards your dad is partial. It's not a pure gratitude. If for some reason your dad stop sending you money you would start hating him. Because you had a conditional gratitude towards him. You have to feel complete gratitude towards everybody. Not just for your dad. Feel complete gratitude towards everybody. Including you enemies also. Lol. Let's take an example of a stranger. Society has polluted the word stranger. The very first impression of the word stranger is something obscure, something unknown. Something fishy. This changes your whole attitude towards strangers. You start treating strangers an unwanted person. Because this is what society has taught you which you have been following for centuries. Like an blind obedient follower. But you missed a lot. Like you have three types of numbers - positive, negative and neutral. Similarly you have 3 kinds of people. First your family and friends. Second your enemies and criticizers. Third strangers. You know some people. You cannot know 6 B people. So for you, number of strangers is much more than the number of peoples in your family and friends. So, that way importance of strangers is increased. Don't think only your friends and family are helping you. Everybody is helping everybody in some manner. Of which you have no idea. You have no idea how a person in Sahara is helping you indirectly. Even if strangers are not helping you directly, then atleast they are not doing something bad with you. Much better case.
Now if I do a startup then my parents will be unhappy. So what should I do? I have my own ego. My dad has his own. Two ego clashes, most probably destructively. I do not say that I don't have ego. TBF - I have a huge ego. I am trying to give it up. But the more I give the more it builds up.I am not saying I am right, and my dad is wrong. No one is right or wrong here. Only perspective is different. My dad has been working in the same organization for almost 30 years. What a consistency. I changed my job in just 2.5 years of my job. I am not competing with my dad to show my consistency. I have a different perspective. He has different. Now its just matter of chance that our perspective doesn't match. Sometimes it happens. A father will never believe his son talking more intellectually than him. You might be able to defeat your dad in a debate, but his inner core won't accept it. Because he has a mindset running from 30 years of being a Creator of his son's existence. And Creator is always bigger. He saw you as infant. He made you walking. He has seen your childhood. How you were not even able to walk or speak. Now the same son who was not even able to speak when imparts his idealism on his dad then his dad is hurt. He get shocked. This where comes the son's duty to respect dad's feeling. If your son is fully illuminated. You will be in trouble. He won't listen you. Buddha didn't listen to his dad. Suddhodan loved him a lot. Perhaps more than any father who would have ever loved his son. The strange thing happens when Buddha goes to meet his dad after his enlightenment. Sudhodana was behaving as if his son is still the same Siddhartha whom he used to lift on his lap. Suddhodan had no idea of Buddha's spiritual status. He cannot see that. Because, he is the cause of his birth.
To please my parents, I am not doing any formal startup in the immediate future.

Draw

Click here to see the game

Deep Meditation

I am not supporter of deep meditation from practicality point of view. Whenever you talk about something. It has two aspect - one is practicality other is transcendental. If you have liability like family, friends, kids, wife etc I would not suggest you to go very very deep meditation. Ask why?

Because, in deep meditation you get connected with BRAHMAN. And BRAHMAN is infinite. It's ocean of infinite depth which has no beginning and ending. The ocean on the earth has beginning and ending. It Has finite depth(11 Km Max) . BRAHMAN is the ocean of infinite depth in all direction. So, in deep meditation your consciousness starts accessing BRAHMAN. Mind is virtually stop. Only I remains - Savikalp Samathi. There will be some trace of I-ness. I-ness in that state has no idea where it is, what he is doing, and how to get out of that state. That is the problem. It happend to me once. Meditation was so deep that I was not able to come out of it. It had almost touched to source of I-ness. From where feeling of I-ness arise. Only I-ness was there. Fortunately (fortunate for my liability, unfortunate for me), that I-ness didn't disappear. If that I-ness disappeared then? Then soul will release the body and I-ness will be merged into BRAHMAN. The game is over. But I didn't want game to be over. So the trace of I-ness remained and ultimately came out of meditation.

The point I am making is it becomes difficult to come out of deep meditation. Because meditation is so deep the feeling of I-ness starts disappearing. You should only go into deep meditation when you really really really want to go. Very similarly when you go to a sea shore. You play in the less water. But if you go ahead into deep water you will be drowned right? But if you really decided to drown then go ahead. Similar thing happens in the meditation. Indian philosophy describe it in layers. There are 5 layers of consciousness. 1. Annmaya Kosha 2. Pranmaya Kosha 3. Manomaya Kosha 4. Vigyanmaya Kosha 5. Anandmaya Kosha.

You can go upto Vigyanmaya Kosha. Ananadmaya kosha is the last. There is no way to come out of it.

:)

PCI Express - Business Potential

PCI express is a great bus. Intel is pioneer in PCI Express technology. PCI Express is a bus architecture which connects peripherals to CPU. An extremely intelligent bus. Link training is the most amazing part. There is not much of business scope left in PCIE gen 2.0 spec. Except you can have some easy market share in writing endpoint applications. PCI Express is packet based protocol. A packet traverse from source to destination via a fixed path. On a way to it's destination it can cross many switches in between. TCP/IP it's not like that. There, if a link is busy then packet will take other route. In PCIE path from source to destination is fixed. It's switch responsibility to route the packet to correct egress port. Mainly PCI Expres protocol is divided into transaction layer, data link layer and physical layer.

From a startup point of view I see I/O Virtualization as huge potential. Because spec is entirely new and there is no product in the market which support I/O Virtuliazation. I/O Virtulization is the is the concept in which CPU uses many Operating systems. That is address generated by CPU is virtual. So, I see good business scope especially from software point of view in IOV. Making an IOV swtich is another nice idea. Generating verification models/BFM for IOV can fetch huge market share. And once you start IOV then you will get envolved. Many things will come automatically on the way :)

Nagaskaki resigned

In this game computer resigned. Lol.

Here is the game

Now, I m planning to increase hash table size to 400MB. Because, I have only 512 MB RAM :(

This chess software takes almost 50% CPU time. With this problem, I got a business idea. We can make a software that will run the software on 100 machines. Each machine will execute certain portion of the code. The only bottleneck is the bandwidth on TCP/IP link. Software will be slowed but it will experience virtually infinite RAM. Will be good if you intend to play slowly but better.

Vote

I am conducting a poll to find out the percentage of athiest people in the world. Please cast you vote here You don't need to register to vote. But I would recommend to register :)
I believe there doesn't exist even 1% athiest people in the world. I just want to confirm this.

Draw with NagaSkaki

Click here to see the game

Game analysis:
This was a draw. I started with sicilian defence. Computer was not that aggressive due to silician opening. In the middle game I had advantage of one pawn on the cost of two of my pawn lined up in the same column blocking the rear pawn. Which ultimately, I had to scarifiace and it resulted in a stupid draw :(

My understanding of Brahman

Diagram below shows my understanding about relationship with Brahman. For understanding I divided Brahman into two part. One is Brahman itself. Second is your self. Third is your body and mind. Essentially, everything is Brahman. But this you wont understand. World's 99.9999% population won't understand Brahman. Therefore, I divided it into three parts. This is not the final diagram. No one can draw the final diagram. Learn from this diagram and the forget this diagram. Don't make this diagram your way of life. This you have always done. You have always made something your way of life. You always got something to do. Could be anything. After birth to death you are not idle even for 1 second.

The lines shows the relationship between you, your body and brahman. In the most of the cases horizontal line is most active. Other two slanted line is virtually absent. Between you and brahman its you. Brahman wants to meet you but you come in between. Your ego comes. Your identification comes. You have layers of identification. You identify yourself with mind. Then with body. Your identification gives you a prejudice. Which in turn is transformed into ego. And ego has many layers of existence. Basically, I wanted to merge lower two points. Because your identification with your body and mind is very strong. So in most of the cases you can merge lower two points and delete the line connecting with Brahman. So, only you are totally identified by your body and your mind. But there are some people who can separate their self with mind and body. That is what is shown in the diagram. You are separated from body and mind but there exist a relation. You are a silent observer of your body and mind.

When this observation will mature more, then left and top point will merge. Then you can say "AHAM BRAHMASMI". "Thou are that". These are the greatest declaration of Hinduism.

One Meditation Technique Developed by Me

Although, I am not a hardcore supporter of techniques, methods etc. But, I feel these are required from practicality point of view. Practicality and absoluteness is totally different. The society you live is practical, absolute is transcendental. Absoluteness doesn't worry much about society. That was one reason why society had always suppressed the absoluteness.

Techniques and methods are sequential process. I am not believer of sequential process. I believe in the parallelism. Because, sequential process spread the time. Sequential process will show you a goal. It will show you a milestone. It will give you a feeling that something great gonna be happen in the future. It will drift your mindset to future. Sequential process are the genesis of cause and effect. On the other hand parallelism is just opposite. It happens in the present. Cause and effect will happen together. Basically, both will disappear.

Just to temporarily accommodate practicality methods and techniques are required. Later when you master the technique it will dropped automatically. So, these days I had been working on one meditation technique. This is not a great invention or discovery. Many meditation techniques exists. But I developed this technique getting ideas from other techniques.

This technique is related to breath. Because, breath is very important in yoga. Breath is the bridge between you and god. This technique involve imagination. I will talk about imagination sometime later. Somehow imagination word has earned bad name. For the time being just take it as granted if you would like. Before I formally describe the technique, reader would need to know about Chakra System. According to Indian Yogic System. There exists primarily 7 chakras and 3 channel in the subtle body. These channels carries pran. So the basic idea is to regularize the movement of pran across these channels. It might sounds you disgusting. You can simply stop reading in that case. So, I developed one technique which will enable you to harmonize the movement of pran in these channels. Please note all these phenomena are happening in the subtle body which in turn will effect the physical body.

Take a deep breath in. And imagine that pran is moving from Muladhar to Ajna through Ida channel. Then exhale and imagine that pran is going from Ajna to Muladhar through Pingla Channel. This become one step. Repeat the steps as many times you want. Then do it in reverse order. That is when you inhale imagine that pran is moving from Muladhar to Ajna into Pingla channel. Exhale will follow accordingly. This way both Ida and Pingla channel should be balanced the pran should move inside Sushumna. This technique would need strong imagination. The basic idea is to balance the pran flow in Ida and Pingla. You can device any technique to do that.

Disclaimer: I do not take any solicitation if the technique shows side effects.

Going to Muzaffarpur this Holi

I am going to Muzaffarpur this Holi on 17th March. My mummy came here to stay with me 2 month ago. I miss Muzafffarpur very much. The city where I grew up. It's been 3 years I celebrated Holi in Muzaffarpur. Holi was one of the most favourite festival after Diwali, in childhood. But now, it doesn't feel much. Something has chaned. Definitely. It appears just like a holiday. But this Holi I am planning to celebrate with full joy.

Ofcourse I wont using internet becuase I dont have internet there. :)

Judaism Vs Hinduism

In my post "My Education - Part 2", I discussed about Judaism. So, here I am continuing...

Judaism is a practical religion. Hinduism is a great religion. Practicality belongs to this world. The greatness I am taking is transcendental. In the core, these religion has same philosophy. Judaism's GOD concept is very similar to the our concept of BRAHMAN. Concept is same. But implementation is slightly different in Judaism. Hinduism was furhter degraded when 33 crores GODs were incorporated. Judaism stick to single GOD. Hinduism made temples. Jews didn't make temple. For them everything is temple. We separated home and temple. That was the biggest downfall of Hinduism. Which we have not yet recovered yet. Slowly and slowly soul of India started drifting into temples. People consciousness got divided into temple and home. Any activity in the temple became more divine as compared with home. This divided the soul. This bifurcated the Indian consciousness between temple and home. This was the greatest insult of BRAHMAN caused. BRAHMAN knows no boundaries. It's everywhere. All temples are part of BRAHMAN. Not that BRAHMAN manifest into a stone. Never. Stone has popped out of BRAHMAN. I consider this as Indian's biggest downfall of which no compensation is possible. In spite of this, Hinduism has done greatest declarations. None of the religion has dared so much. Hinduism directly put you to the level of GOD withing a fraction of second. That way I consider Hinduism as the fastest religion. Zen also. I will talk about Zen later. Judaism is all about practicality. They don't worry about enlightenment. That's the one reason, Judaism has not produced a single enlightened being. Judaism cannot produce Buddha. No possibility. But Judaism will produce Einstein. There are many fundamental similarity between Einstein and Budddha. To me both are same. Different attributes of existence. Buddha sees the divinity everywhere. Einstein sees energy. E=mc2. Only approach is different. Result is same. I would not do deep quantitative comparison between Einstein and Buddha. To the society Einstein can be more important. Because Buddha simply transcend the society. He left society. So, society wont be able to understand what Buddha is saying. But society will understand Einstein. Because Einstein obeyed society.

Jews incorporated holiness in their every activity. For them every work is holy. They are united They believe in WE. India is all about I. I for India. Lol. However, this is ok when observed from core. People have misunderstood this I-ness. This I-ness is about totality. It's not your ego. Ego is extremely subtle. Many people says I am not at all egoistic. But they don't know that saying I am not egoistic is also a part of ego. Ego is extremely subtle. To become ego less mind has to transcend. Otherwise it's impossible to give up ego. I have seen many polite, humble and consistent people. If you talk to them it will appear that they have no ego at all. He will appear as if a perfect human being. But when you observe him little bit closely. You will start seeing ego. A subtler ego of politeness, humbleness and consistency. Grosser ego has disappeared but a new ego has started forming. And sometimes, this subtler ego is even more bigger than grosser ego. Somehow, I find ego of politeness and humbleness are far greater than so called normal ego. Usually, it's said polite and humble people are ego less. But on the contrary I find them most egoistic - ego of politeness.

Stalemate with NagaSkaki

I had a stalemate with NagaSkaki. It was a nice game. Click here to see the game :)
Stalemate is a situation when king or any other piece has no square to move and there is no check on king. Stalemate results in draw.

My Education - Part 2

I studied till Intermediate (10+2) in Muzaffarpur. A small town. My first school I remember was "Aadarsh Vidyalaya". I was in nursery. The school is non-existent. I still remember practising for independence day and republic day. Amazing were those days. The school was walkable from my home. Then went to "National Public School". Studied there class 2 and 3. I remember one tutor used to teach me that time. That was a damn. Then studied 4Th and 5Th in Jupiter Public school. In Jupiter public school they used to prepare me for various entrance exams like Sainik School, Netarhat, RIMC etc. Then my dad shifted me to a better school - Shishu Shiksha Kendra. This school was one of the costliest school of Muzaffarpur. It was situated near Jubba Sahani Park, Miscot lane. I learnt a lot here in this school. I have changed lots of school in my life. Finally, I cleared the first written test of Netarhaat. But could not clear the second test. Second test was just objective based. First test was subjective. So, I thought, if I can clear subjective test then why not objective? Perhaps I didn't prepare well for the second test. I really really wanted to study into Netarhaat Vidyalaya. But could not. Failure in Netarhaat exam was one of the biggest sadistic time of my life. I had totally broken from within. Then took admission straight into class 9Th in Zila school. Zila school is only for boys. Because in course of preparation had finished 8Th classs syllabus. Zila school was total fun. Zila school is almost 2 KM from my home. School fee was Rs 3 twice a month. Very cheap. But the study was also cheap. We used to go to school, and after attendance come out of class, and play in the field. Zila school has very big play ground. Then we used to play cricket till afternoon. I used to be busy talking with friends. I remember, I would have hardly attended 20-30 class during 2 year in zila school. We do not study in school but we had tutions. we had morning tution by Mr. D Pandey sir of the same school. He used to teach, Physicas, Maths, Adv Maths and Chemistry on thin paper-carbon. He was incharge of computer lab of school. He showed us the computer first time. It was a black and white screen. Dont know what OS. Perhaps DOS? Then after morning tution we rush to school and gossip, play, watch girls on the way. Basically, Girl's high school Chapman is very close to Zila school. And we knew the timings of Chapman. When a bell rangs in chapman you can hear them in zila school. I (with my friends) used to go home when girls also used to go their home. We synchronize our timings with them. Roads used to get jammed by girls. They walk in groups. Like 4-5 girls will walk together. And teachers in zila school were hilarious. They come to school and sleep. Good for us. That way we get ample time to play. The most funny part was quarterly exams. Whose result were never declared. You can bring all the chits in the exams. Even I also used to bring chits in the exam. Not even chits you can bring books also in exam. My performance was bad in the 9Th class. May be out of frustration of not getting into Netarhaat. But, finally in matric I secured 2Nd position in the school of 700 boys. Everybody was shocked. I was most shocked. There were 4-5 guys. Good guys I would say. Everyone were expecting these guys would top. The guy who topped in my school was extraordinary. A thin guy. He used to come to school only on the fee collection day. That is twice a month. We used to go to get his "Darshan". Lol.

Then came L S College. Studying into L S college was even more horrible. By that time pressure of JEE started building up. I had 2 separate turions for Physics, Chemistry and Mathematics. All at different places. Apart from that I took Brilliant tutorial study material for JEE. Brilliant tutorial is all junk. In my time. I dont know the current status. Life shrinked to books. Books become life. Then life became artificial. Like a machine. A huge rat race started. And I just participated in the race. I had no choice. A race which is never going to end. That put me into an non-ending race. Joined E & ECE at IIT Kharagpur. The father of all IITs. My rank was shh it, so I got dual degree. 5 Year course. My dad got a headache oh it's a 5 year course? Why did you take this course? One more year extra study? I learnt many thing into KGP. I am grateful to KGP. I am not talking of academic learning. Thing I learnt in KGP is there is always a better student. Always. If I am good, then someone else is better than me, someone else is better than him. And it goes on and on. Even if you are PGM, there still exist a better student. So, I understood PGM is not the solution. I will cover my stay in KGP in some other post. It's very long. 5 Years.

Now coming to philosophical part. Above was a story. Intelligence is diversified. Usability could be different. Society has always worried about practicality and usability. Society is like bunch of sheep. It goes on and on. But where? Society has not idea of that. It just goes. Society has huge inertia. Huge prejudice. An accumulated inertia of 5000 years. Have you ever thought the relationship between society and GOD? Society talks about god. But it's not much worried about it. It's more worried about usefulness. You should be useful. In some way. Then society will like you. Society always taught you do something useful. Have you ever done something which is not useful? This teaching has penetrated deep into the consciousness of the people. It keeps the mind active. You have something which is useful to society, then you are in demand. Society always works on usability. I am still discovering why does society give so much stress on usefulness? Society feels insecure? As of now I see love is absent. Love is the only way to secure you. Brain cannot secure you. Love can secure you. Einstein has a brain which was useful to society. That's why he is respected among society. He may not be respected in the kingdom of GOD. But society will respect him. Because he has something what society needs. There are many things which Einstein cannot do that. But that's okay. Society doesn't need it. If you ask Einstein to do mental binary multiplication of two 64 bit arbitrary number, can he do that? I guess he cannot. Even if he can do with 64 bits can he do with 100000000000 bits? He cannot. But the person who can do such thing may not be useful to society. So, it's kind of matter of chance that What Einstein can do society needs it. There are many thinker. Who can think much deeper than Einstein. But they think in different direction. Of which society has no idea. So, those people are not in demand. But there exist such people. Society moves in a direction. These people think in exactly opposite direction. The do have some consensus. But the approach is opposite.

Day by day, moment by moment society learns to survive better. That I believe. Next day should always be a better day. That's the purpose of today. When I use the word Society - I should be specific. Society in the west is different than the culture in the east. Have you ever thought why Jews are so intelligent? Remember, a society is always biased by it's religion. Judaism is a practical religion. That's the one reason there are no so called enlightened person in the Jews. They can be good scientist, thinkers, business men etc. But not the enlightened one. Their concept of enlightenment may be different. But it doesn't fit into our definition of enlightenment. Judaism cannot produce people like Jesus, Buddha and Mahavir. No possibility. They will produce Einstein. Einstein also thinks. Buddha also thinks. But the approach is different. Now Einstein's thinking is useful to society. Buddha's thinking may not be that useful to society. Because Buddha hits on absoluteness. And as I said, society doesn't worry much about absoluteness. It does acknowledge absoluteness. But it doesn't worry about it. Doesn't strive for it. I am not condemning anyone. However, they do have absolute definition of GOD. They definition of GOD matches with our BRAHMAN concept. The best thing I noticed in the Judaism is they say every work is sacred. They try to bring holiness in every action. So far them each act is godliness. However in Hinduism they have separated it. They separated temples with houses. So when you are in house you are no doing godly activity. But when you are in temple - you are doing godly activity. This divide a person. His consciousness is divided. But that's not the case in Judaism. There every action is holy. Better. They believe in "We". Hinduism is "I". Essentially Hinduism is all about I-ness. It doesn't care much on We-ness. They believe if every "I" is good then "We" is automatically good. Because "We" is comprised of "I". But when "I" sees "We" it feels very feeble. This happens in Hinduism. Because the "I" am talking about is the absolute I. Not the "I" you know. Concept of Hinduism is very nice somehow it cannot be applied in its completeness to everybody. That's where the problem comes. The only solution I see is that every body has to move in one direction together without any exceptions. That direction could be Love. Could be compassion. But certainly it cannot be mind.

More later. There is still much more to talk. But the post has become too lengthy :)

My Education

Last weekend was full of chess. This post is about my education.
Education which doesn't free you is lame. Our education system is bulky. Education we had/having bind us. It doesn't free us. It makes us more knowledgeous. Knowledge in general boosts ego. The knowledge we have is all bookish. Bookish knowledge is not absolute. It's just a kind of information. You read those black lines and the information is stored in your neurons. That' it. Civilization has come coward. So you think the more you know, they more work you do your situation will be better. But that never happens. In my 10Th class I was crazy on study. I studied like anything. 16-17 hours per day. I had immense craze in mathematics and physics. I solved Irodov, Krotov, Resnick-Halliday, Tipler and many more...In my childhood, I used to dream about Nobel prize. Now, I don't want Nobel prize till my next 1 billion life time (if any ;)). That's what the change has happened in me. My attitude has changed totally. Now to me book is like an ash. When fire is finished, ash remains. That's what the book is - for me.
Till 8Th std. I was counted as an average student. That time didn't heard of IIT. Life was peaceful. It was going on. Was playing cricket in the evening. There was no future. No milestones. Only present was there. All problem started when I heard of IIT. Cricket stopped :(. When I got 99% marks in maths in matric. Wish I were lucky to get just 30% marks in maths. I would be more happy. I really really really really hate 99% marks. This was the highest marks in Bihar board. Then my dad thought I am an intelligent student. So, he asked me to prepare for JEE. He is right in his own way. I am thankful to him. But, he didn't know that I might be the most foolish student who ever walked on the earth. Because for me - Intelligence and foolishness is same. Different attributes of mind. But still mind. My real journey begins when mind drops. As long as mind is active - then it's a drama. I have no interest in that. Then gradually future started building up. Then the milestones started appearing. And the moment you start seeing milestone, a journey, a destination - you are gone. Because, there is always a next milestone. To me, now there is no journey, no destination, no milestones. My marching is over. I marched. I marched a lot. And only thing I learnt by marching and marching that you don't get anything out of marching. Marching is like a mirage. It leads nowhere. But, it does appear to lead somewhere. An apparent reality. Not the absolute reality.
To be frank, I never wanted to touch a book ever. I wanted to enjoy. To celebrate the existence. I just touched it to meet social expectations. Family expectations. The biggest question they ask is - what will you do if you don't study? Now this is a stupid question asked by stupid people to the stupid people. I am not stupid. As if I have taken birth to do something. What can I do? Who has done so far? Name me a single person in the entire history who had done anything good? Good or bad, finally, they all went to their grave. Death comes and take away everything you have. All these problems is due to death. If people don't die - then what you are saying makes sense. Then you go on making money. Go on reading books. No one is going to stop you. Remember one thing, today is only for today. Tomorrow might be different.
I wanted and still want an education which can free me. Which doesn't boost my ego. Lets imagine if education doesn't give job. Who will study? No one will study. So, there is an incentive in the education. That, you get a job. I wanted incentive free education. But society has always lured you. By giving some incentive. Which for some reason is enough for your survival. But you miss to become infinite. As I said, society doesn't want you to be infinite. They want you to behave like an obedient slave.

Never show your intelligence to your elder relatives. There are reason behind this. Take an example of your mom. Your mom has seen you when you were infant. When you couldn't even walk that time. They made you walking. They taught you A, B, C D...So for them you will be always a kid no matter how intelligent you are. Because, they have seen you dragging in the dust. They wont believe you. My mom says, I used to eat ants, soils etc. Who will trust a person who used to eat soil ever? That's the one reason why great great people are not easily recognized where they grew up. Because they have seen their childhood. They saw you toppling in the mud. They get shocked. This happend with BUDDHA also. Wish Jesus also. When BUDDHA went to meet his father after his enlightenment. His father was thinking and behaving like earlier. Buddha gave many logic. But Shudhodana could't understand. He can't. Because he taught Siddhartha how to walk. In the city of Nazareth people used to call Jesus - he is the same shapherd. They can't imagine a shepherd becoming infinite. Similar thing happend with Krishna also. So, friends never show your intelligencey to elder people. Especially who have seen your childhood. They won't buy your any argument. They will simply neglect it. :)

Chess with NagaSkaki

It was a long game. Click here to see the game.
Not to mention that I took some move back :)

Chess

Today again I played with computer. I also added a PGN viwer to my website. Click here to see the game. You would need Java enabled browswer to view the game. After some time game will be loaded and you'd see a chessboard. Then keep on clicking > button. It will show you moves. :) If you click on the play button it will show u as a movie. You can also control speed of moves.